Mitt Wins. Therefore Santorum is Victorious.

Romney wins Arizona, and a narrow victory in Michigan. Both he and Santorum are using the same event to declare a kind of victory.  Romney won, but barely, and therefore concludes "the win is all that matters," which is hardly true for him in contests that he's narrowly lost. Santorum lost, but proclaims "the fact that we almost won in your backyard means that people like me more," a logic that will hardly carry over for him when the fact that he lost to Romney among fellow Catholics is considered.

Denial is a bastard, it is true.
Observe: the state of Michigan is won
For Romney. Rick is beaten, isn’t done,
But both are claiming something of a coup
On one another. “Michigan is yours,”
Santorum says, “but almost fell to me.
Therefore this loss is but a victory.”
The logic, though, won’t follow for the scores
Of fellow Catholics who voted Mitt.
And Romney, much the same, has given blame
To those who, for a day, would, voting, claim
That they were GOP. No one will quit
Recoloring a loss with winning hue.
The truth is this: we’re not that into you.

Santorum's Operation Chaos

I missed a day. Here's to catching up.

Santorum is seeking Democratic votes to help him win Michigan's primary.

I see Santorum made a couple calls.
I would have done the same, for ballots are,
When all is said and done, on equal par
With one another. Hoping it forestalls
A Romney victory is something more
Than rational. Consider this request:
“I would, if you would vote at my behest,
Have all and any ballots tip the score
To me, and not the other.” Or, rephrased,
“If I could pick the guy I want to lose
Against Barack Obama, I would choose
Santorum.” It would look as if you’d blazed
A mighty trail to fall before it’s done,
With votes that you had counted ere you’d won.

I Bet It Sucks Being Upstaged by Farrakhan

Oscars happened.

I didn’t watch the Oscars. Harvey won,
And nobody’s surprised. It didn’t sell,
And neither did the viewers rate it well.
I bet it would have been a lot more fun
To watch sir Baron Cohen prance about
With supermodel escorts. Per the rest,
You know you’ve failed a viewer litmus test
If eager readers more enjoy the clout
Of Farrakhan, when speaking. I’ve a choice
Of Harvey or of Loius. There you go;
You’ve been upstaged by harbingers of woe
In baskets full of crazy, in a voice
That oscillates, as crazy often should.
(Congrats, though, on the movie. It was good.)

The Book, the Book, the Book is on Fire

Servicemen and women are dying and in danger due to riots in response to an accidental Koran burning in Afghanistan.

Many foreign armies have entered Afghanistan, only be driven away, leaving a trail of blood.  The downfall often starts when the foreigners wonder why the natives aren't grateful for the peace after the invasion.


Americans are dying for a book.
The Right is mad that we’d apologize,
Assuming it’s surrender in disguise.
And this, I think, is why we overlook
That we’ve ignored a cautionary sign:
Afghanistan is burning for a cause.
You cannot win a rescued man’s applause
If your mistakes and mishaps misalign
Your good intentions to the many men
Of many other countries come before,
With liberation coming, leaving gore.
The failure is at hand when we begin
Insisting we are owed a debtor’s thanks.
That’s when the death starts seeping through the ranks.

Al Assad is Packing Heat

The US has been quietly (until now, anyway) warning the Mideast of plans to disarm Bashar Al'Assad if his regime falls from Syrian grace.

The best, and worst, part about this article is the Comments section. So many people seem to have access to highly classified military information.

Bashar has got a weapon, or a few.
The Middle East is watching. But the best
And saddest picture of the way we guessed
That weapons were in Baghdad is the brew
Of Left and Right conspiracies below
The article, within the comments. Read:
“The weapons are Saddam’s, and intercede
We must,” or “Bush is evil; it’s a show
To get you in on an invasion.” Hell,
The few existing facts are not enough
To call for war, or peace, or call a bluff.
But we, like Rorschach, see that all too well
We are correct, and in debate, attack.
Objections are the Devil striking back.
(I bet that’s how it happened with Iraq.)

Dear Sweet Lord, I Love Sacha Baron Cohen

Sacha Baron Cohen has been banned from traversing the Oscar red carpet as his character in his new movie, The Dictator. The Academy, apparently, feels it would be undignified. I agree, which is exactly why I wish they'd let him do it.


Dear Sacha Baron Cohen: I’m a fan.
The older gents of cinematic might
Have all forbidden us the viewing right
Of witnessing indignity. The man
You play is banned from walking down the aisle,
And I suppose, if you would do it, true,
So many followers would do it, too,
For their upcoming features, but a smile
At the mocking pomp and circumstance
Of gentlemen in suits is lacking here.
For even rodeos have need of cheer
From clowns in spotted vests and baggy pants,
And you're one better, for you bring astride
The pomp, a certain laughter, dignified.

Photo Finishes Aren't Always Fantastic

It's still neck-and-neck between Santorum and Romney, although Drudge's headline and photo, once again, clearly do not match the article.


Nobody’s very bad, or very good,
Or very much a favorite. This is all,
And that’s unfortunate. If any brawl
Is going on much longer than it should,
The audience has little time to bond
With whoe’er is the victor. Gingrich knows
He’s losing, and is parrying the blows
Directed towards the finalists. Beyond
A hope of winning anything, alas,
Is Paul, a foil all the rest require
(Consistency, it seems, does not inspire
Citizens to voting booths en masse).
A photo may be called to call the win.
Too bad, for then the real race will begin.

Rick Santorum's National Rorschach Test

I missed a day. Of all the days to miss, this wasn't it.

Rick Santorum is coming under fire for using clearly religious language to discuss his domestic and foreign policies. His words very easily give way to one of two interpretations, one benign and healthy for the country, the other spelling doom at the hands of someone determined to bring about a theocracy and question the president's faith.

It's a Rorschach Test. I love Rorschach Tests...oh, how I love Rorschach Tests. Everyone's answer reveals the way they truly think, and it's rarely flattering.

Santorum spoke of Satan. Oh my god,
The world has found its savior, or its end,
And all will all their energy expend
In finding which it is. I would applaud
A voice that simply, frankly, didn’t care,
Or didn’t care that others were offended.
Alas, it isn’t so. “The Left intended
To destroy the man, caught unaware
In saying something honest,” is the line
That’s given me by radio and Right.
“He thinks he is the savior and the Light,
And thinks Barack Obama will assign
The world to evil,” says the Left. Absurd.
The man, I’m sure, but poorly chose a word.

Iran Cuts Oil.

Iran has cut oil to several European countries in response to increased sanctions against Iran. I suspect much of this is posturing, given that a US warship sailed through Hormuz a few days ago without so much as batting an eye, which implies that for people on the ground, it's business as usual.

Iran is cutting oil to the west.
The warning bells are ringing in the mind
Of pundits, politicians, ill-defined
Historians who speak at the behest
Of war, and Neville Chamberlain’s mistake
(“Appeasing an aggressor is unwise,
And Achmadinejad is full of lies.”)
The theory is, my mind is not awake
If I am anti-war, or cautiously
Give out my trust in Mideast nations. Well,
This Achmadinejad can go to hell.
Iranians, however, tried to free
Their country from his rule a while back.
We group them all as one if we attack.

Besides, they needed weapons in the war
With one Saddam Hussein, who battled for
Himself, and then the Saudis, and the States.
The fear of all the western potentates
Was of a strong, invincible Iran.
Now everyone is doing what they can
To stop an end that’s doubtless set in stone,
Inevitably written. We had sown
All this upon ourselves some time ago.
I wish upon the Dulles brothers woe,
Or would, were they alive, and Kermit, too,
And reprimands for Eisenhower, who
Allowed Iran to suffer as a slave.
And Mossadegh is rolling in his grave.

On Houston's Funeral

Whitney Houston's funeral is finished.

The funeral is over. Many sang,
And Kevin Costner spoke, and were it best
To lay the singer in eternal rest
Within her early church, many a pang
To many would it bring. The governor
Chris Christie flew the flags at half a mast.
(He caught some anger for it.) If at last
She’d found a peace that she’d been looking for,
The heady throng of mourners here suggest
That she had left a bit of peace behind.
To any troubles, memories are blind,
But to her kindness, memory is best.
The mourners thus her memory abide,
In yet another day when music died.

Mitt and Rick are Neck and Neck.

Romney and Santorum are now both fighting legitimate-chance-to-win races for the Republican presidential nomination. The biggest hurdle is Michigan, where Mitt was governor, and where, ironically, he has a chance to lose.


Republicans are worried of a split.
Mitt Romney’s got the deeper pockets; Rick
Has got him some momentum, and a quicker
Rise in popularity in thick
And thinning core of followers. The race
Is over if, in Michigan, a loss
To Rick is in the cards for Romney; gloss
It over how you wish, if Rick’s apace
With Mitt within his home state, it’s a go.
I wish I knew who I was voting for –
They both are fond of torture, and of war,
And though I’m happy neither’s apropos
In spending to the president, the gain
In wealth is lost if we from peace abstain.

Female Circumcision, and God Almighty

Hillary Clinton gave some remarks yesterday regarding the total ban on female circumcision in the United States (oddly enough, banned only as late as 1997).
There's a gritty description of female circumcision in Ayaan Hirsi Ali's Infidel, and an odd remark, spoken by her grandmother, that referred to a belief that all women of the Sudanese tribe in the book must be cut, lest their clitori grow to the size of a man's penis and they die in childbirth.

That seemed an odd worry.

Several months later, over a drink with co-workers, a biology major entered in a discussion about the oddities of animal genitalia, focusing on the hyena. The clitori of female hyenas grows as large as the hyena male penis, and causes incredible pain in childbirth, often killing the mother. And hyenas, of course, are all over the Sudan. The logic wasn't hard to follow.

Still an odd worry to have, but less so. At least if you're in a nomadic society.


The picture is of Hillary, aghast –
Or consternated – in remembrance, here,
Within the State Department, of the sheer
And quite excruciating pain that is amassed
From cutting off the labia. Alas,
Religions are a mystery to me,
Though I confess, and quite emphatically,
I’d rather have the boy cut than the lass
(Assuming that I have to make the choice),
For reasons dealing with the agony
Of the procedure. No religious freedom
Here removes the specter of a voice
In agony, and crying out to what
Unyielding god had ordered she’d be cut.

Obama vs. Iran vs. Israel

Obama's poll numbers are approaching 50% (I don't have the image, but it was headlining for a few hours), and Netanyahu is insisting that sanctions on Iran aren't working. Sanctions rarely do.  Netanyahu's speech denouncing Iran wasn't the point or centerpiece of his visit to Cyrpus, which was primarily about business, trade, and military agreements.


So, Netanyahu journeyed out to sea
To see the Cypriots. And though they’re friends,
A visit there might serve to make amends
For long alliances with Turkey, the
Oppressor of the Cypriots. The trip,
However, is o’ershadowed by a cry
For war for later peace, and if allying
With a greater power will equip
A smaller country for a bigger world,
It’s recommended also that you heed
The causes it promotes, and if the creed
Is “there will be invasion,” you’ll be hurled
Within the fray. Do business, but take care;
The world is cruel to those caught unaware.

Obama’s numbers are at half a glass.
The pessimist suggestion is a loss.
The optimistic one is that a tossing
In of any towel is a crass
And gross miscalculation. On Iran,
I’m betting he’ll be silent, while the Right
Will busy be decrying any might
That Persia might acquire. If the ban
On any import in the country works
To make it reconsider making arms
(it won’t; our sanctions put the poor Harm’s
Amoral Way. It’s one of many quirks
We never seem to learn), we’d be at peace.
Or so it’s said by any press release.

World Oil vs. World Bank

The US Warship Abraham Lincoln sailed through the Strait of Hormuz yesterday, and was not shot at, sunk, or threatened in any way that any talk of war between Iran and the west would suggest.

Also, the head of the World Bank is stepping down.


The Lincoln floated through the Strait, and lo,
We didn’t have a war. I do confess
I wonder at the battling finesse
Of any nation willing to forego
A modicum of evidence of guilt
For an assassination. Diplomat
Or scientist, the murderer is at
The very echelons and at the hilt
Of power in Iran, or Israel. Words
Between the two are thrown about, but we
In these United States have quietly
Positioned here a fleet. Observe, it herds
A warship through the waves. Debate is free,
But better still to think logistically.

And also, Robert Zoellick’s stepping down,
And Hillary’s suggested for the crown.
(It's given some conservatives a frown.)

There Will Probably Be War. Also, Celebrities Do Drugs.

War is brewing in the Mideast. But the article on Whitney Houston is much, much, much longer.

The last time one of Israel's diplomats was shot while tensions were high with a neighbor, Israel invaded.


The Jewish state is ready for a war,
If history’s an indicator. This,
The Ayatollah’s posturing, dismissing
Any claim of innocence before
The facts are gathered on the circumstance
That nearly killed Israeli diplomats
By Mr. Netanyahu (caveats
To all who hold an innocent romance
With Middle East due process), is a lot
Like Lebanon in ’82. The fight
Would boil in Beirut many a night
Because a diplomat had nearly gotten
Killed, and though we'd PLO condemn,
(And justly so, perhaps), it wasn’t them.

(And also, Whitney Houston may have done
Too many drugs, and if you sit and wonder
Why I’d even point it out, behold:
Her tale takes three times longer to unfold.)

The Stegae, the Stegae, the Stegae's on Fire.

Athens is burning as riots spread across Greece in response to the new and severe spending cuts and tax hikes approved by parliament in order to bring Greece into compliance with the requirements for Europe's new bailout.

In Athens all the money’s running short.
The shops, some 34, are all ablaze,
And Europe ticks away remaining days
Until the Grecians pay, or they abort
Attempting the impossible. Police
Are out in riot gear; the Grecians, masks.
Preoccupied with their respective tasks –
Of beating or of burning – any peace
Or any hope of future unity
Or reconciliation in a land
Where money’s either borrowed, or it’s banned,
Is very slim indeed. If Grecians the
Austerity refuse, the very core
Of all the west may suffer evermore.

Whitney Houston is Dead. Don't Call Her 'Susan.'

Whitney Houston died late yesterday night.

I'm not that familiar with her music, so this one was difficult. I tried to make every line out of a Houston song lyric; some of the phrasing is awkward, but I was able to use 14 songs for 14 lines. They're listed below, in order of appearance:

1: After We Make Love
2: Million-Dollar Bill
3: I Didn't Know My Own Strength
4: In My Business
5: You'll Never Stand Alone
6: Just the Lonely Talking Again / Still My Man
7: How Will I Know
8: Miracle
9: Miracle (continued)
10: Worth It
11: Saving All My Love
12: Count On Me
13: Love Will Save the Day
14: I Will Always Love You

And now, the poem, which, I suppose, I really didn't write:

It’s gonna take some getting used to, this,
The feeling, like a million dollar bill
Is crashing down, and tumbling, and still
Alive, ignored, as if you don’t exist
And cannot see past any shadow. Dream,
And visualize the season of your love
Returning, taking you to clouds above
The pain, that at a time would truly seem
All you have gained. Your miracle is gone.
It had the world, and only wanted you,
And kept you in at home, and feeling blue,
Was strong when you were weak, and counting on
A love to come and save the day. But I
Will always love your voice, though it’s goodbye.

Ron Paul May Win In Maine, and Nowhere Else

Ron Paul may win in Maine.  It's a shame about those racist letters.

The doctor hasn’t won a state. The rest
Have made the race a contest, and the last
(Reviled heavily because of past
Unseemly tracts of racial rage, abreast
Along the doctor’s signature; revered
As well because the things he prophesied
Have, each one, come to pass, regarding greed,
And wars, and foreign anger) has appeared
A likely winner in the state of Maine.
And though he cannot beat the other three,
I wish they’d give a thought to how forseeing
Trouble years ago is very plainly
Reason in itself to here detest
The letters, but to listen to the rest.

Matt Drudge Needs to Hire New Personnel

LAPD has set up a "war room" to monitor crime in the city, which is, as it turns out, nothing more than a sophisticated CPU to monitor patterns in crime. It's hardly news.  The implication behind the picture is that the USA is heading towards a police state, when in fact the article simply chronicles the rise of a branch of LAPD that analyzes crime data to determine where a criminal will next strike.


The headline doesn’t match the story. Drudge
Has done this for a while; make the tale
Appear as holy controversial grail
Of politics, and though I don’t begrudge
Embellishment when necessary, this –
The story in the headline, the police
Awash in riot gear, as if a peace
Were certain to be broken, the abyss
Of all of human evil to appear –
Is not at all the story that is writ.
The story isn’t big – the city gave
Computers to some analysts to save
The city from a paucity of wit
That here had threatened safety. And the Drudge,
Orwellian, is giving fear a nudge.

Obama vs. Bashar

The White House is asking top generals for several options for dealing with the escalating situation in Syria.


The Syrians are better still, by far,
Against Bashar than any there before
Had been against the former, Hafez. More
Had perished in the violence and char-/ring
Gas, and in the bullets, or the tanks,
Or steamrollers, that followed all the rest
And flattened Hama, all at the behest
Of Hafez, than had perished in the ranks
Of all the men rebelling at the rule
Of his less-able son. Bashar is not
His father, and his power hasn’t got
Intelligence, or knowledge to be cruel
When necessary only. He is weak,
And power will a vacuum ever seek.

The end is now beginning. Enter in
The USA, and none of us will win.

Santorum Wins, and It's a Race Again.

Summary: Santorum wins Colorado, Minnesota, and a somewhat irrelevant Missouri, as it isn't worth any delegates.

For once it isn’t Mitt, and isn’t Newt.
Santorum isn’t out of any race
Requiring conservatives, apace
Of any new destruction in the root
Of all the good within the USA,
To have a better history of wive(s)
Or honoring the many unborn lives
That we have here neglected. Yesterday
He won in Minnesota, mile-high,
And (uselessly) Missouri. Still, I hope
He finds a better answer for to cope
With all the middle east. Though letting cry
“we’ll bomb ‘em” isn’t quite what I would call
A strategy, you cannot win ‘em all.

Obama vs. the Political Action Committee, vs. Money

Barack Obama has decided to approve the giving of donations to Priorities, USA, a Democratic Super PAC that could help him cover the tremendous budget gap between his campaign and the campaigns of the Republican challengers. Super PACs can accept unlimited contributions from corporations, businesses, etc., which gives them an edge when it comes to fundraising.

Obama needed money, so he took
A little from a source he may regret.
Now everyone is saying he forsook
His principles, and were I one to bet
Upon the verdicts of the right and left,
I’d say the same to each: campaigning is
Expensive, and I’d rather be bereft
Of promises than funding in a business
Favoring the one who can afford
Commercials, or a party. To the right:
Obama flipped, but everyone’s on board
With Gingrich; to the left, when you’ve a blight
Upon you, you are far too quick to blame
The right, but money wins. And you’re the same.

Manning, 2; Brady, 0

I was wrong.

I think I was the only one I know
Who rooted for New England. I confess
I didn’t watch Madonna, the transgressive
Finger flip, the ads, or any blow
That Tom or Eli gave the other, save
The very last, when Welker dropped a pass
That came in very high. And Tom, alas,
Retreated to the lockers, very grave,
While Eli stood elated, yet again.
I’m very glad my chosen work, indeed,
Is writing poems that no one else will read
Instead of facing many angry men
Who’d hoped and bet upon far better ends.
(I should have bet New York, like all my friends.)

Romney is Winning. Again.

Romney is, it seems, doing quite well for himself.

So, Mitt is winning, if you didn’t know,
And if you didn’t, know this: he’s ahead,
And Gingrich is behind him, and the lead
In Paul and in Santorum is a blow
That’s heavily excused, and then ignored.
The whole of politics is a denial,
When all officials of the rank and file
Here dismiss a contest when it’s scored
And when they didn’t win it. Marvelous,
Indeed, is such a measurement. The win
Is counted in your favor, and a spin
Is put on any facts that make a fuss
And hamper your conclusion. Battle on,
Ye delegates, when reasoning is gone.

Syria, Russia, China, and the UN

Russia and China have both vetoed a resolution that would have condemned Bashar al-Assad of Syria and demanded that he step down.

It looks bad.  But then, when Bashar's father Hafez nearly leveled an entire city in Syria, the UN didn't even have a resolution or a vote.  And I suppose a vote with "no" is better than no vote at all.




The world is very angry at Bashar
Except for Russia, China, and the few
Remaining army loyalists. The coup
That brought his father in is very far
Away indeed from everything his son
Is doing to destroy the country. We,
Condemning the too-eager gunnery
Of all the king’s enforcers, while we shun
The younger Assad, must remember this:
We didn’t say a word in ‘82
When Hafez killed some 20,000. Few
Indeed were cries that something was amiss
Within the UN Council. Do not fret.
Though vetoed, 0 and 1 is better yet.

Terrorists vs. the Super Bowl, vs. TSA

Summary: TSA has trained a great many hot dog vendors to spot suspicious activity. I don't want to knock it too much, given that it may, in fact, prevent a less-organized attack. But I do find it amusing that a terrorist would be, on the one hand, proficient in English, video technology, and conversing with cops (one of the suspicious activities), and not have stumbled on the idea that it's good to read the news, and keep abreast of what the US may be doing, and therefore be forewarned of all the things TSA is looking for.

Dear Terrorists: the Super Bowl is nigh,
And if you’re planning here some evil deed,
Know this: the TSA has here decreed
That vendors have authority to spy
On all the attendees. I know it’s odd.
For, given that requirements to be
Suspected are not quite what I’d decree
Suspicious – drive a van, or give a nod
To some guy in a hoodie, make a tape
On camera or cellphone – I suspect
We haven’t given any good reflection
On the kind of man we’ve given shape.
He freely talks to cops, but doesn’t read
The news – a very stupid man, indeed.

Usually Silent Donald Trump Speaks Out

This is the sonnet for February 2, 2012.  Donald Trump announces a major headline, which turns out to be an expression of what he likes, and his expected measure of public awe in reaction to what is not quite as earth-shattering an opinion as he may have hoped is rather amusing.

Anyway, Trump endorses Mitt.

I’d read that Donald Trump was due to speak
On who he’d be endorsing, and he did
This morning, but the day before the lid
On who he’d be endorsing had a leak
That hinted at the former Speaker. Well,
To tell the truth, I really didn’t care,
And really don’t care now. As unaware
As I may be on politics and selling
Property, and Vegas, this I know:
Nobody cares what Donald Trump is doing
Except for Donald Trump, and those he’s suing,
And others that are suing him, and though
He’s rich, he’s not a man I can forsee
Existing, sans the caption: “Look at me!”

Mitt Won.

Mitt Romney won the north of Florida, but
The south was 50-50. Now we know,
And at the risk of one “I told you so,”
The losing candidates are undercutting
All the reasons why a victory
In Florida is reason to rejoice.
The former speaker, in determined voice,
Was promising the world that it would see
A better outcome in the other states.
And Dr. Paul was promising to show
That once he truly tries, we all will know
That he is still a force, and in the dates
Remaining, Rick will say the very same.
Defeated, all but Mitt, in all but name.